Let Go of the Old You. And Begin Again

There comes a point when you must face a quiet, uncomfortable truth:

You are not who you were.

And that’s okay.

In fact, that’s necessary — if you want to live.

The Illusion of the Past

We all have an old self that clings to us like a shadow at noon. The bad decisions. The painful memories. The stupid mistakes. The relationships that fell apart. The versions of ourselves we wish we could erase.

But here’s the thing:

What’s gone is gone.

There’s absolutely nothing you can do to change it.

As Bob Proctor put it: “To spend your time focusing on the past is to spend the only thing you’ve got — the present.”

You see, each time you replay that old memory, that failure, that betrayal, you’re doing something tragic:

You’re making sure your future looks exactly like your past.

That’s the great paradox: we hold on, thinking we’re protecting ourselves.

But all we’re doing is chaining ourselves to a story that no longer serves us.

Why Letting Go Feels So Hard

Imagine you were born hanging from a cliff.

Everyone around you is clinging to that same cliff, screaming, “Don’t let go! You’ll fall!”

But one day, someone whispers, “If you let go, you won’t fall. You’ll float.”

You want to believe it.

But your grip tightens.

That’s the dilemma of letting go.

It sounds so simple, just loosen your grip.

But the fear that runs our lives, the fear that’s been conditioned into us since birth, keeps us clutching tighter.

And here’s the cruel joke: that fear is a bluff.

It’s the bluff that says:

• If you let go of the pain, you’ll be weak.

• If you forgive yourself, you’ll invite failure again.

• If you stop blaming others, you’ll have to face your own choices.

But none of that is true.

The Real Cost of Holding On

Holding on poisons you.

You may not feel it at first. But your body does. Headaches. Tension. Sleepless nights. That quiet hum of anxiety in your chest.

Jordan Peterson described it well: when your brain tags an old memory with anxiety, it’s like your smoke detector is stuck on.

The alarm keeps ringing, not because there’s a fire anymore, but because you haven’t reset the system.

Your body stays on alert, as if the past emergency is still happening. And it won’t stop until you go back, learn from it, and update your map of the world.

You can’t just ignore it. You can’t just “move on” in your mind. You have to clean it up — consciously.

The Three Steps to Letting Go

Letting go isn’t about forgetting. It’s about freedom. And freedom takes work.

Be aware of what you’re holding

Ask yourself: What am I really holding on to?

Is it the shame of who you were?
Is it the anger at what they did?
Is it the fear that you’ll fail again?

Letting go begins with honesty. Shine a light on what you’ve buried deep.

Most people skip this. They chase positive thinking, hoping it will drown out the dark. But until you face what’s lurking there, you’ll never be free.

Feel it fully

This part is hard. But essential.

You don’t let go by thinking — you let go by feeling.

That means:

• Stop escaping into distractions.

• Stop numbing with food, alcohol, or endless scrolling.

• Stop trying to fix or change what happened.

Instead, sit with the feeling. Let it rise. Let it move through you.

Because here’s the secret: those emotions want to leave. The more you resist them, the more they stay. The more you let them flow, the faster they dissolve.

Stop interfering — just let

Letting go is not something you do. It’s something that happens when you stop trying to control everything.

It’s like exhaling after holding your breath too long.

You don’t need to force it. You just need to allow it.

As one of the teachers said, “Everything you’re holding on to wants to leave. You just have to let it.”

The Power of Decreasing Importance

Here’s a trick no one teaches you:

The more importance you give something, the harder it is to let go.

Think of how you’ve given power to your past:

• If they had approved of me, I’d be happy.

• If that hadn’t happened, I’d be successful.

• If I were a better person, they wouldn’t have left.

All that meaning — all that importance — creates resistance. It’s like holding a beach ball underwater. The more you push down, the more force it takes.

But what if you released the pressure? What if you saw your past as neutral, no longer good or bad, just done?

Suddenly, you create space for new beginnings.

Why We Stay Attached to the Old Story

If letting go is so freeing, why don’t we do it?

Because the old story feels familiar.

It feels safer to say:

• “I’m not good enough.”

• “People can’t be trusted.”

• “I always mess things up.”

Familiar pain can feel more comfortable than unfamiliar peace.

And so, we sabotage. We relive the same patterns. We choose partners who repeat the wounds of childhood.

We chase approval from people who will never give it.

Why? Because it keeps the old story alive.

But the truth is: you can choose a new story.

How to Begin Again

Here’s the most beautiful part: you can begin again anytime.

Right now, in this breath.

Letting go isn’t a one-time event. It’s a practice. A daily choice.

You let go when you stop taking score.
You let go when you stop measuring your worth by the past.
You let go when you fall in love with the process of living, not the outcome.

Think of an athlete in the zone. They’re not thinking, “I must win.” They’re immersed in the moment. And that’s why they win.

The same is true for you.

What’s Waiting On the Other Side

When you let go of your old self, you don’t fall.

You rise.

You discover:

• The calm that comes when you stop fighting yourself.

• The clarity that comes when you stop replaying old scenes.

• The courage that comes when you stop fearing failure.

You stop chasing love, money, success, and find they come to you. Why? Because your energy is no longer tangled in resistance.

You become magnetic.

Letting Go of Others

Letting go of the old you often means letting go of old them, too.

The people who knew you as weak.
The ones who fed your self-doubt.
The ones who hurt you — and the ones you hurt.

Let go with forgiveness. Not because they deserve it, but because you deserve peace.

You don’t need their apology. You don’t need to change their mind. You don’t need to prove anything.

You’re free the moment you decide to be.

Your Fresh Start

The only moment that’s real is this one.

Right here.
Right now.

Let go of the old self. The bad self. The stupid self. Let go of the stories. The blame. The need to control.

And step into what’s waiting for you: a life unchained.

To Be Honest

I probably need to read this more times than you do.

Thank you for reading — if this helped you, I’d truly love to hear your thoughts.

And as always, if you’re ready to take the next step in improving your life, our productivity planners are a

great place to start → Olsnotion.com

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